Where Do We Go From Here

   

 I've had a dream - a vision of where I wanted see my life go and how I wanted to live it out. I had plans. I thought I had it all figured out. Until...God showed me that His plan for my life was going to be different than the concept I had created and drafted in my head...and heart.

When Alex and I were planning our life together, preparing to be married and looking for direction, we would spend hours fantasizing about the kids we would have, the home we would live in, the job, the church, our ministries, and everything and anything else you could think of. We had it all planned out and we were prepared for a life time pursuit of our dreams.

Then things started spinning out of control...before the wedding even had a chance.

God made it crystal clear from the start- Our life together was not going to be about us.

Very early on (and continually since then) I've been reminded that my life pursuit could not be about what I wanted or what dreams I had bent my heart on. If I was going to walk through this life as a disciple of Christ, He needed to have every part of my life...including my dreams and where I wanted to go. The honest truth was that my vision for my life was not centered on God- I was wrapped up in the philosophy that my life pursuit should be a passionate battle for the things I wanted.

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So the question we've had to ask ourselves now is... where do we go from here? 

We are married, have a baby and are working hard together to provide for our needs (and sometime wants). But we still have our whole lives in front of us...and no idea where God is leading us or where we will end up. Over the last few years of trying to pursue venture after venture, we still feel no closer to where we wanted to be.

Where, Lord do You want us to go? What do You want us to do?

It is so hard to not get caught up in the things we see for our life. Especially when those things aren't bad things. But when things don't work out - despite how hard we try, it becomes discouraging and discontentment and hopelessness sneaks in like a ninja seeking to destroy.

No matter where we go or what we do, as long as we are looking to serve God and honor Him with our actions and decisions we can't fail. I mean we will fail many time, over and over and over again, but God will lead and help us find the way- especially if our hearts are in the right place.  It doesn't matter what the world thinks of the way we live our life if we are giving it all to God. That is all He asks from us.

When we were growing up and starting out on our own we were so obsessed with finding the perfect school, perfect job and life plan. That is what the whole world was telling us we needed to do. People judged us based on what we chose to pursue. What we didn't fully realize then was that our careers and life styles didn't have to define us. Sure, people are always going to have an opinion about what we should do and where we should go, but before God- if we are giving it all to Him and let Him lead our foot steps-it doesn't matter. 

When we leave it in God's hands- careers and pursuits don't define us- We are set apart as His servants- Devoted to His works -Not to the work men

Suddenly it isn't up to us to pull it all together and make all the ends meet. We go where He leads us, work hard in the jobs He has given us, and live with the help of the Holy Spirit as purely and devotedly as we can. It's isn't about us- It's all about Him.

So what can we pursue with this mindset? 


Alex and I have thought and prayed long and hard about this. Since everything we try to pursue seems to fall through, how do we and what are we supposed to go after? Obviously we will always try to pursue God in all things (we are human after all), first and foremost. But there is still a part of us that know that we have to make decisions and goals for our family as we grow and mature.

There have been three main things on our hearts as a couple since we've been married that we honestly believe God has instilled in us.

1. A Heart For The Orphans
2. A Heart For Encouraging Others In Their Walk With The Lord
3.  Having Our Home As A Safe Place Where People Can Be Refreshed And Stay

No matter where we go or what we do in our life we just what to serve God in every way we possibly can. But these three things have always been deeply set in our hearts. We have always wanted to adopt/foster. We believe that the word of God teaches that as believers and disciples of Christ it is our responsibility to take care of the orphans. Since we know that we won't be able to have any children of our own any way, we whole heartedly believe that God is making room in our home and hearts for children who need a family to love and teach them. We feel confident that unless God closes the doors for either adoption or foster care, it is His heart for us to devotedly pursue and trust that He will provide the finances and whatever we need to adopt.

Likewise, when it comes to our passion to encourage and nurture people in their walk with the Lord, this is something that we are taught to desire through the word of God- in addition to being a family who brings people together and opens our home to the world. All of these three things are not against God, so as we walk, we want to diligently seek all these. If God closes the doors then that is fine, because ultimately we are here to Glorify Him in whatever we do...not just through what we want to do. If cleaning toilets and living as simply as we are able and seeking God first in everything is all we accomplish in our lives, I believe we believe that God can use that. We are not failures.


We don't have life all figured out. We don't have even a little clue as to where we are going to go or the things we are going to do through Christ. But we don't have to know. We just have to pray, seek, respond and live contently; with passion, devotion and a joyful attitude - wherever we are.

Today it is in my parents home, working hard, barely making ends meet, discovering Christ more intimately everyday. This is where we are now, and we can serve God today through the simple things, praying that God will give us opportunities to serve Him. We don't have to wait for tomorrow... for tomorrow, who knows where God will take us. 

With an Earnest Love,
Leah