Nine weeks away from our wedding and sunddenly we find ourselves challeneged anew in our faith in God's power and provision. God allows things in our lives that don't always make sense; situations and incidences that throw every thought or preception of control out of the window and simply force us to trust that God has a better plan. Sometimes it isn't even that plans change, but that a blessing the birthed from a situation of need and trail.
Tomorrow it will have been a week since the Alex's accident, and we still have no answers and no idea what this could mean for our being marriage. Alex was injured at work a week ago, and since has been unable to work and waiting for clearence from work comp for an MRI. At this time, he is stuck at home, unable to do much anything aside from waiting and praying. We have no idea how bad this could be, there could be a possibilty of surgery, or physical therapy. There is a chance by God's grace that his knee will be functioning again within a few weeks and he will be able to go back to work, but at this rate there is no saying how long he may be out of work, or how long and detailed the healing process may be. Nine weeks away from beginning our marriage and suddenly our income is cut in half, with no idea as to what the next few weeks or months may entail.
At first, our initial reaction I admit was far from calm. We were very concerned, but then after prayer and time had passed, Alex was graced with both wisdom and insight that stilled our anxious hearts. Through the past several years, we have been through so many trails and so many tests of faith and endurance, but in every situation, especially those that caused the most fear and anxiotey, we were blessed in ways that cannot even be expressed. Alex helped me realize that we are serving a God that created the world more perfect than anything we can imagine now, a God whose power and majesty is unsearchable without comparison- a God who allows trails for our growth and benifit, a God who sees beyond today and desires to bless and draw near to us. Alex asked a very difficult question when he challenged me to see things through God's eyes. He asked: "Can you believe that this is really a blessing from God and not just another situation we need work through?".
Out of work, hurt, disfuctional, and we needed to see God's blessing in that. God certainly is not making it easy to trust Him. He has now put us in a situation where we have to entirley trust that He will provide for us. Not just financially, but also with the work comp situation and our plans for school and moving. We are now in a situation that could make things very difficult for the next serveral months, but God is so much bigger than that.
You know in the moment it isn't easy to trust that God has control because we can't physically see Him working out the details. But even then God has provided truth in His word that confirms His faithfulness to His believers. We are serving a God that rained food the heavens to feed His people wandering in the wilderness- there is no need to doubt the unbundance of His grace and blessings. The question now remains, what is He possibily going to do in this situation? How is He going to use this for His glory?
All we can do now is continue to pray, wait and trust. We are choosing to believe that this situation in someway is a blessing from God. I just pray that He continues to remind us when we doubt and become anxious again.
I do have to say in the midst of all of this, that Alex and I continue to grow closer and deeper in our bond together. This situations has only deepend our intimacy emotionally and spiritually, and that in itself is a blessing. I am so thankful to God that He has devolped this relationship between us, Alex is more of a man than I could have ever hoped for, and I've never been so happy and blessed at the idea of spending my life beside, no matter what trials we face together.
