A Blessing- Nothing More To Say

Dear Readers,

 In truth I had a whole elaborate post planned and prepared. While changing our little Pumpalumpkin's diaper, I indulged in a passionate narration of my pre meditated thoughts throughout these past few days. It was quiet a captivating speech I assume by the distant little grey eyes listening so intently adding the occasional "mmm"' and "daddaddada" to the symphony of my dramatically exaggerated vowels accompanied by the theatric expressions which come so easily to a Mother trying to entertain to keep the tears away for a moment more. In hindsight, perhaps it was only the melodramatic performance that kept her engaged for the moment and not what I had to share. In either case we shall never know, for as I nestled in the great cushions of the parlor grey love seat, cradling the smallest, the most beautiful love I've ever had to hold- the quiet stillness of the evening sunk into my heart, sinking into every nook and cranny; warming my very soul. Peace over came me in waves quenching every thought I had retained. 

     In a moment all I had to say rushed out of my head as quickly as it h
ad come leaving me motionless and staring helplessly in-love at the little face snuggled up against my breast dreaming and smiling sweetly to herself. All of my plans and speeches disappeared leaving me with just four words:

So this is Love. 

    As I carried her to her crib and gently laid her down, as I held her hand for a moment more and kissed her little forehead, I knew there was nothing in the world that could change this love. When I closed the door quietly, and listened for a moment, I heard the soft waves crashing in the distance as her noise maker recreated the ocean sounds, and the silence that reassured me she was peacefully resting. 

   So here I sit. Quietly. Waiting ever so patiently for my thoughts to clear. But I can't get her little eyes out my head. I can't stoping thinking about her little smile, with her singular top tooth glinting pearly white as her dimpled cheeks beg for kisses and mess of curls on top of her head bounce from side to side. She is our own special miracle; an amazing blessing from God.  

Some days can be really hard- being a mom.

Sometimes I have a hard time remembering how precious every moment I have with my daughter is.

Some mornings I'm so tired I don't know how I am going to be able to get out of bed.

Some nights when she just can't stay asleep, I want to curl up and simply cry.

Being a mom is one of the hardest things I've ever done. But it is moments like right now; when I can bask in the bliss of joy being the mom of the most beautiful blessing I've ever received- that makes every difficult moment worthwhile above and far beyond anything I could give or endure for her sake.

The truth is: tonight I am tired, I might have the worlds worst headache, and have nothing truly notable to say-but I am also overwhelmed with love, thanksgiving and irrepressible joy for the blessing sleeping on the opposite side of wall growing big and strong.

Don't forget that our children grow and will eventually leave our homes. Hold them close tonight, kiss them once again, and tell them how much you care for them while you can.

Love Always,
Leah