My God of Today

I’m learning to embrace the glory, power, active and living magnificent display of God’s work in me today. Not only what my future may hold or the next hour- right now, in this very moment God is living, alive, real, and present. I’ve spent a lifetime looking into the future, waiting and anticipating what I dreamed for, longed for, prayed for and I’ve missed out on hours, days and years of God’s very present work in me and my life.   

One of my greatest struggles is looking to God in the future days; I loose sight of Him in today, and yesterday. My God is not just a God of the future, He is my God of today. His power and magnificence is not only for my future - it’s for now; in the midst of diaper changes, dumped bowls of cereal, and lack of showers. 

I catch myself so often thinking thoughts of “someday”. ‘Someday God will use me, someday God will speak to me, someday I will learn that, someday I’ll be living the life as the disciples of Christ did, someday God will lead me exactly where He wants me and I’ll be able to work and serve Him.’ 

But what about today? Can’t God use me even when I’m tired and need to sleep? Can’t God use me now even though my little family is living in my parents house? Can’t God use me even though I don’t have everything figured out? Deep in my heart I think I believe that God can’t use me because I still have so much to learn and I still struggle with sin so deeply; it is overwhelming. I don’t believe I have enough to give, I don’t have the means to serve the way I’ve envisioned myself serving. I don’t have enough. I’m not where I need to be. 

Wow... What happened to nothing is impossible with God. He calls the weak, the unprepared, the nobody. He has the power to use me, work in me, through me, and calls me to Himself today. I don’t know where He will lead me in the future or that I’ll even have a future. Maybe I’ll go home tonight, maybe I’ll live a hundred years? In either case I don’t know what waits for me down the road, but I do know that I don’t have to wait to discover and serve God where I am today. 

I may have very little and not be in a position to pursue what I believe God may be leading me to do someday, but today I do have an opportunity to give what I have, learn and pursue God with all my heart; broken, messy, weak me.